I crochet.  I learned on my grandmother’s knee when I was seven years old and I have done it on and off all my life.  But put two needles in my hand and I was flummoxed, even though I always WANTED to learn how to knit. Well, given that I have had a bit of […]

Every woman out there is going to sympathize with me today. Because I don’t think there is one of you that hasn’t had a day where you have thought “If I don’t get this [insert offending, constricting, hideous garment of choice here] off of my body RIGHT THIS SECOND I am going to run screaming […]

I finally got in to see the specialist yesterday about my leg. After-hour clinics are basically equipped to evaluate whether you are dying (in which case they send you off immediately to a hospital with real doctors) or not dying (in which case they tell you that you are not dying and give you a […]

Those motorized carts in the stores aren’t nearly as fun or as fast as they look, nor do they come close to fitting in a dressing room or between clothing racks. I will never again take for granted immersing my entire body in a bathtub.  Or carrying my own coffee cup down a hall. Armpits […]

Mine started with a 4-6 inch spiral fracture in my right fibula. You?

Otherwise titled “The post in which I get all petulant and stamp my feet.” I usually approve all my comments. In fact, there is only one non-spam comment I have ever NOT approved. A while back, a semi-regular reader (at least from the IP address and my hit-counter) posted a comment to one of my […]

Ever had one of those headaches where shoving a drill through your cheekbones for drainage suddenly seems like not only a rational idea, but a preferable one? Except for the fact that if you do, your head might explode like a popped balloon, leaving a empty sack of skin dangling from your neck. And I […]

My husband loves show tunes. If you want to make a comment about the underlying meanings of that preference, I will allow you to make those to my seven-foot, 300-pound, bald, ear-ringed, bearded hulk of a husband yourself. To his face. What this means is that his satellite radio in his car regularly alternates between […]

I almost don’t want to say this, because I know if I do, it will jinx everything. So I am going to write it very, very tiny in parentheses and please don’t read this out loud, or I am holding you responsible for the consequences. (I think my son is potty trained.) I haven’t changed […]