My Level of Awareness

Christian living books are really not material that makes its way onto my bookshelves very often. Although I have been attending my local United Methodist Church regularly (a late development), and I do enjoy it a lot, I would describe myself as more spiritual than religious. My relationship with my Supreme Being is very direct and personal, and neither of us seem to stand a lot on dogma.

But my middle brother has become very involved in the youth ministry at his church back in New York, and as a Christmas gift, he sent me this:

You could have no children, completely skim the references to Christianity and read only the chapter on the differences between scarcity and abundance thinking and you will have gotten your money’s worth from the book.

The premise is this - our society is based on the idea that our measures of success are based on scarcity thinking, that things worth having derive their value from the fact that they are limited. Exclusivity increases value. From the standpoint of personal and society development, this is a recipe for disaster. It is a concept that places us in constant competition with each other, a system with a few “winners” and a losing majority. And the idea is that the constant competition will ultimate lead to innovation which ideally benefits all by trickle-down.

But it is a system that by its nature, by its very design breeds discontent. Progress is defined and driven by the feeling that happiness is brought by things that not everyone has. We are an economy and a society that is motivated by unhappiness.

How completely messed up is that?

I am an acknowledged gadget girl, and you are going to laugh when I tell you this, but if I think of all those moments where I am the most supremely contented, there isn’t a single material possession involved.

What brings me happiness?

Family.

Friends.

A job well done.

All these things are things that are available to us in abundance for the making. If we teach our children (and ourselves) that THESE are the things that bring us happiness, that these are the measurements of a good life, well lived, they will have the formula to live contented, fulfilling lives. If we convey to them somehow that we measure our worth by the car we drive of the size of our house, we are setting them up to compare their lives to the inevitable person with the larger house and the more expensive car, instead of teaching them that we “win” when we reach out and share what we have to create the circumstances for true happiness - companionship and cooperation.

We are setting them up to be unhappy. We are teaching discontentedness

And yet, avoiding that exact situation is damnably difficult. We are constantly bombarded by messages that tell us that the quality of life is in a bottle or can be placed on a credit card. Homes are not places to live and to love and to make memories in - they are investments to be traded upward in a race to make the most money and have the most house. We mortgage our happiness in an incremental race without asking ourselves that in the penultimate moment if this will be the way we will measure our existance. Will we leave this world at peace because of what we own? Or will that peace be brought by the happiness and love we gave away and were given?

Stop and think about the messages we send our children. Are their parties about the gifts or the companionship? What do we celebrate when we celebrate? What do we discard? What do we keep? Are our hands and our hearts open or closed?

What do we tell them about the value of life?

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Hard to tell which is sweeter - the girl or the flowers.

The beautiful girl is Harry’s cousin - my sister Jennifer’s daughter - amongst the lilacs at the Highland Park Lilac Festival in my hometown; over 500 varieties of fragrant spring goodness.

The smell of lilacs always makes me a tiny bit homesick for New York in the spring.

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This is a Public Service Announcement

After perusing the search terms by which many of you have arrived here,  I feel I should perform a bit of bloggy service, just for you.

“La vie dansante” translates to “the dancing life.”  It means a carefree way of living, a life of joy, “going with the flow.”

It is also a song by Jimmy Buffet.

And now I will direct you to the original blog entry by that title.

This entry just a lagniappe from the friendly staff here at My Level of Awareness.

(PS - lagniappe (LAN-yopp) - a little something extra)

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As you know, dear readers, I spend a lot of time on airplanes.  After 9/11 only once did I think twice about terrorists while flying, and that was when I had to travel on the anniversary date.  It really doesn’t even sneak into my conscious mind.

But FAA Inspectors?

They terrify me.

Gotta go get on that silver bird now…

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Just to clarify who you are - you were the one getting on the Yellow line northbound at Chinatown as I was getting off at about 10:00 last night.

It pains me, that I, not a native Washingtonian, must lecture you on proper Metro etiquette.

However, since you have chosen to ignore all of the announced requests to allow exiting passengers to debark BEFORE entering the train, I feel I should reiterate this necessary point of manners a little more graphically.

1. If you allow exiting passengers to debark you MIGHT find that there is a bit more room on the train for you and your stuff.
2. If you would use this slight delay not only to allow the debarking passengers to clear the entrance, but also to organize your stuff a bit more effectively, it MIGHT be easier to fit through said entrance.
3. It MIGHT also be less likely to result in the afore-mentioned debarking passenger uttering profanities at you when you collide with them violently.

If you STILL do not have memory of this occurance, please check the backpack you used as a battering ram for your entrance onto the train for the 30-inch section of long red hair that you tore away with you during the collision.  I believe the scalp is still attached.

And, although I do not have the daily experience with Metro etiquette that you do, I feel on more comfortable ground with the following:

If you forcibly collide with someone (who, incidentally HAD the right of way), and cause them bodily injury, a simple “excuse me” or “beg pardon” will go a long, long way toward making you seem less like a thoughtless b****.

And because I know my manners:

Thank you, for your attention.

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I am working on one of those deep, thoughtful posts, but I just had a quick announcement I wanted to make:

I am in love with Corinne Bailey Rae.

If she weren’t much younger than me, totally out of my league, and, well, female, I would totally have her children - I mean, if I could still HAVE children, but it’s the thought that counts, right?

Sigh.  And I thought I was too old for girl-crushes.

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This news, as expected as it was, sent a shock through me.

I was a Cold War baby.  Fidel Castro has been in control of Cuba since five years before I was born.  Condemnation and distrust of the nations listed in the Communist Roster was instilled in me from my earliest awareness - on the news, in school, over the dinner table.

And yet, there’s a twisted sad nostalgia at the news…

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I have been following this story in Galveston since this baby boy was found.  Please take a moment to say a prayer for little Alijah:

http://texascitysun.com/story.lasso?ewcd=70a90518d422dfae&-session=TheDailyNews:45936D61050e422A22Ykw28671AA

 Because I am speechless with sadness at the world.

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Because I was intrigued, I stole this meme from Midlife Mommy.  Obviously, some of the answers for my son are projected based on current plans.  Someday maybe I will show this to my son, so he knows how good he has it.  The things are true are in bold.

 The meme from my parent’s perspective (8/34):

1. Father went to college

2. Father finished college

3. Mother went to college (Dad’s mom went to “Normal School” for teaching)
4. Mother finished college (Dad’s mom got a “Normal School” certificate (teaching))

5. Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor

6. Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers.
7. Had more than 50 books in your childhood home. (Dad lived on a farm - no TV, only books)

8. Had more than 500 books in your childhood home.
9. Were read children’s books by a parent.
10. Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18 (my mother had figure skating lessons)

11. Had more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18

12. The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively.
13. Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18.
14. Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs.
15. Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs
16. Went to a private high school
17. Went to summer camp
18. Had a private tutor before you turned 18.
19. Family vacations involved staying at hotels
20. Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18 (Mom was an only child, Dad was only boy)
21. Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them. 

22. There was original art in your house when you were a child.
23. You and your family lived in a single-family house

24. Your parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home
25. You had your own room as a child (Mom did - only child.  Dad did (only boy))
26. You had a phone in your room before you turned 18.
27. Participated in a SAT/ACT prep course

28. Had your own TV in your room in high school
29. Owned a mutual fund or IRA in high school or college.
30. Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16

31. Went on a cruise with your family.
32. Went on more than one cruise with your family.
33. Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up.
34. You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family.

The meme from my perspective (8/34)
1. Father went to college (community college - associate’s program)
2. Father finished college
3. Mother went to college
4. Mother finished college
5. Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor
6. Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers.
7. Had more than 50 books in your childhood home.
8. Had more than 500 books in your childhood home.
9. Were read children’s books by a parent
10. Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18
11. Had more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18
12. The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively.
13. Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18. (I worked for Macy’s, so I had an employee card)
14. Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs.
15. Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs
16. Went to a private high school
17. Went to summer camp (one summer - Girl Scouts)
18. Had a private tutor before you turned 18.
19. Family vacations involved staying at hotels
20. Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18 (I was the oldest)
21. Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them.
22. There was original art in your house when you were a child.
23. You and your family lived in a single-family house.
24. Your parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home
25. You had your own room as a child (only girl in the house)
26. You had a phone in your room before you turned 18.
27. Participated in a SAT/ACT prep course.
28. Had your own TV in your room in high school.
29. Owned a mutual fund or IRA in high school or college.
30. Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16.
31. Went on a cruise with your family
32. Went on more than one cruise with your family
33. Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up.(Dad did)
34. You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family.

The meme from Harry’s perspective (22/34)
1. Father went to college
2. Father finished college
3. Mother went to college
4. Mother finished college (twice!)
5. Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor (okay, PhD, but not professor)
6. Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers(when he gets there, likely so.)
7. Had more than 50 books in your childhood home.
8. Had more than 500 books in your childhood home (did pre-Katrina, and likely again soon)
9. Were read children’s books by a parent. (Every night)
10. Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18 (We are starting him in music lessons)
11. Had more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18 (Likely)
12. The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively.
13. Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18 (not if I can help it)
14. Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs. (We have a 529 for him, if he doesn’t get scholarships)
15. Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs.
16. Went to a private high school (possibly, but I doubt it.)
17. Went to summer camp
18. Had a private tutor before you turned 18.
19. Family vacations involved staying at hotels
20. Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18 (most, with some hand-me downs from cousins)
21. Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them (Oh, hell, no!)
22. There was original art in your house when you were a child.
23. You and your family lived in a single-family house
24. Your parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home (we hope, maybe not)
25. You had your own room as a child (only child)
26. You had a phone in your room before you turned 18. (He’ll likely have a cell)
27. Participated in a SAT/ACT prep course.
28. Had your own TV in your room in high school (No plans for it)
29. Owned a mutual fund or IRA in high school or college (born too late - need OUR retirement)
30. Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16 (already has - three times)
31. Went on a cruise with your family (hopefully)
32. Went on more than one cruise with your family
33. Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up.
34. You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family. (If I can help it, he will never worry about this like I did).

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The Days Inn in Van Ness - Not fancy - in fact the rooms are decidedly spartan, but clean, cozy, EXTREMELY convenient, and reasonable.  And, free wireless.  Of course.

Tesoro Italian Restaurant in Van Ness - The food was incredible, and the service was five-star.  The prices were not - a combination that makes this place irresistable.

The Washington Metro - God.  I love the Metro.  I want Metros everywhere.

Dinner with Jodi - She’s funny.  She’s incredibly cute (and I am incredibly jealous of it).  She knows great Indian restaurants.  And she shares my views on childrearing - which are that everybody is entitled to their OWN VIEWS.  I love it.

All in all, it was a perfectly satifactory trip to the Nation’s Capitol City - despite the disappointment of missing Potter’s Violins in Bethesda and a walk down the Mall, because it was too cold, dark, and rainy when my meeting finished.  And, of course the fact that I had to MISS MY FAMILY for three days.

(whine, whine, whine)

But that’s okay. 

I’ll be back in February.

Sigh.

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